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    Right then festival folks, metal heads, and that certain breed of man that likes his long hair with his chain wallet (which aren't allowed but we'll get to that), this is NOT your 'white girl with a flower headband' festival, ahem Forecastle.  Don't get me wrong, Forecastle is amazing and I'm certainly not knocking it in anyway!  I was there, for the love of music-man-crush Jack White, but Louder than Life Festival is a different Fatboy ride altogether, Harley Davidson style that is.

    Touting itself as a 'Music + Whiskey + Gourmet Man Food Festival' is just the beginning if the gurney ride into Metallica's (don't get hype, they're not playing) 'Sanitarium'.  I've been some places and seen some things, as my thousands of loyal readers can attest, but I've never seen anything like this.  Let's just start with the lineup, yeah?  From a hard rock / metal perspective the only thing missing is Metallica, Motörhead, and it being the late 80s/early 90s.  Personally, I'm a bit surprised that Kid Rock is even in the same company as the likes of Judas Priest, Mastadon, Korn, Five Finger Death Punch and even Papa Roach but alas The Detroit Don Juan is closing on Sunday.  Honestly torn on some of the lineup as it's tough for me not to see Scott Weiland reunite with Stone Temple Pilots, but then again I snob on Alice in Chains without Layne Staley too.  We can argue this perspective all day, but I'm the writer and you come find me like a boss so we can take it offline.  On the STP note though, Chester Benningfield (Lincoln Park, duh) will be the frontman there so that could bode well for you screamers.  Either way the lineup is ridiculous on both the headliner level and the under card.  Fuel?!  Really?!  Let's have that 'Hemorrhage' like the time they opened up for Aersosmith in 01.



    'Gourmet man food'?

    Yes, yes, and hell yes.  The over/under on them running out of Trooper: Iron Maiden inspired beer is at 4 hours I'd say but my 'buddy' in Vegas says there isn't an opening line.  Mostly local flare, some not, but whatever that palate is after you can find.

    Venue?  Now here's where I think things may get hairy.  At the corner of Zorn Avenue and River Road, and what was formerly River Road Country Club's 3rd hole, is what leads up to the main stage from what I've seen thus far.  I'm not sure if you're very familiar with the area but there isn't a lot of parking.  I'm told parking will be mostly diverted to the Water Tower grounds, so with rain forecasted for Friday get out the mudders and carpool.  No re-entry is a man smack in the beard, but you can bring blankets to pass out, oh I mean sit, on.  All you need to know is here, but I'd highlyly recommend reading so as not to get turned away for trying to sneak in your hula hoop (really?  no hula hoops?  what kind of hotel is this?!).  

    Tickets!!  Still available and amazingly reasonable for a 2 dayer.

    That being said party people, rest up and bring a jacket without your 'gang' patch on it as it could be a tad chilly.  Imagine most will warm up with plenty of brown water, but what if the missus decides to get loose and run around topless and you don't have anything to cover her up with?!  Stranger things have happened but either way looking forward to a new experience and a couple days of pure badassery.  In me you trust, xoxo

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